It’s like the older I get, the more I have the urge to sort things out for myself.
As a young man I had no problem with the chaos inside me, I could even embrace it and feel it was a big part of my creative process whatever I did – mostly as a musician.
I wrote crazy poems, lyrics and songs. I collected notes from my wife (still do). And everything was “for the moment of things” with no plan or structure. When whatever I did was done it went down in a box almost instantly. The result beeing boxes full of papers, notebooks, drawings, ideas, lyrics and recordings of things that “might have been”. Some things “became”…
When I turned 40 something happened. I got more and more organized and structured. Not by some active choice. It just happened. So the last couple of years my creative process has been very structured. I sit myself down regularly to write new songs or lyrics for the band. I sort, organize and prioritize things around me, and things that were. I suspect this blog has something to do with it to.
Music has always been a big part of my life – I play, listen and write it. It consumes my soul, defines who I am. Sometimes it lifts me and sometimes it breaks me. Nevertheless music has, and always will be, a vital part of my life. So in the car on my way to work this morning I realized there a couple of songs that really defined me as a young man. Songs I still can remember exactly where I was when I first heard them. Like a game changer for my life. Songs that completely altered me and my perception of the world around me. So in the light of the above I realized I just have to list them.
As always in my blog I’m not sure why stuff ends up here. Maybe it’s so my youngest daughter some day when I’m gone can read this. She might smile and think to herself, “ok, now I get it, that’s why dad was the way he was”. She’s the one born in my image. She’s the reflection of me in heart and soul and she will know what this all means and what to do with it (yes you will – dad).
So over the next weeks (starting tomorrow) I’ll post my list of the top 5 songs that formed me when I was young. For my daughter to read when I’m dead. (yes you – Dad)